Initiation

The ceiling creaks as someone moves in upstairs. Someone else has moved in recently too, my boyfriend’s sister. Now, empty pbr cans litter our living room and kitchen. The new addition to our household has told us that her sleep has been restless. I suggest she maybe invest in earplugs, or another viable option, we’ve joked, drink more, a lot more, before bed.

The jingle jangle of the ice cream man.
Sirens.
The bus.
The neighbors hang a picture.
Midday- A woman yells ‘fuck’ a hundred times in a row.
The click-clack of the siblings on their laptops playing tetris with each other, while sitting right next to one another.

We take his sister out. I realize the man ahead of us is peeing while he's walking down the street, leaving a squiggly trail. Talk about multitasking! The people passing in the opposite direction act as if he doesn’t exist. They don’t see him. Blank shells, staring at the ground, in their own world. I turn to my compatriots, “Oh My fucking God!” “Don’t step in that (I‘m pointing), he’s peeing while he’s walking down the street!” I’m visibly loosing my shit, my mouth gaping open, while these people coming at us look like they’ve had their brains sucked out of their heads...Zombpees.

You would think that I’m immune, by now, to happenings such as this. What surprises me about this instance, in particular, is that people like this dude in front of me, actually do things like this. Who the fuck are you to whip out your penis wherever the fuck you are? When, a few steps later, he enters a building, where I suspect, there’s a toilet he could have used. But no, he’d rather expose himself to everyone, and pee on the sidewalk. Needless to say, if you think you smell urine, you do. Many thanks you weren’t there when it was happening.

When I think I’ve seen it all, I‘m always surprised with a new little treat. I try not to step in the runoff, my boots are new.

Welcome to the TL little sis!